I. Introduction to parenting styles – Diana Baumrind, (1975, 1980) identified three styles of parenting. Maccoby and Martin (1983) suggested that there is a fourth style of parenting.
A. Each family is unique. What will work in one family may not work in the next due to differences in temperament, life styles, schedules, etc. I can tell you what worked for me or some other family. I can tell you what research shows to be the most effective style of parenting, however, each family must find their own stride and work out their own details.
B. Two dimensions that characterize parenting styles (Holden & Miller, 1999).
1. Control – parental control refers to how restrictive parents are (this isn’t the same thing as the discipline technique of restriction or grounding).
a. Restrictive parents limit the child’s freedom
b. They actively enforce rules and see to it that their children carry out their responsibilities.
c. These parents are dictatorial and try to regulate every area of their child’s life.
d. Parents who exert little, or no, control have children who do whatever they want and don’t think about their parents’ response. (Kilgore, Snyder, & Lentz, 2000).
2. Warmth – parental warmth refers to the amount of affection and approval the parents display.
a. Warm, nurturing parents give frequent praise and encouragement to their children.
b. They are involved with them
c. They respond to the child’s emotional needs
d. They spend lots of time with them.
e. They enjoy hearing about their daily activities.
f. They limit criticism, punishment, and signs of disapproval.
g. Parents who are not warm often criticize, punish, and ignore their children.
h. They show little affection or approval and sometimes are even hostile toward their children.
i. They don’t want to hear about their child’s activities and consider it a waste of time to converse with their child. (Pettit, Bates, & Dodge, 1997; Zhou, et al., 2002).
II. Four parenting styles described
A. Authoritative
1. Level of control and warmth – moderately high control and high warmth
2. Description
a. Parents accept and encourage the growing autonomy of their children
b. Parents have open communication with their children
c. Parents set flexible rules (less flexible in younger years but increasing in flexibility as children develop and gain autonomy)
d. These parents set limits on behavior, but the limits are reasonable.
e. Parents provide age-appropriate explanations for rules that are appropriate for the child’s level of comprehension
f. Their actions do not seem unfair or arbitrary to the child and so the child is more willing to accept limitations.
B. Authoritarian
1. Level of control and warmth – high control and low warmth
2. Description
a. Parents issue commands and expect them to be obeyed
b. Parents have little communication with their children –
c. Parents set inflexible rules and rigidly enforce them
d. Parents allow children to gain little independence from them which can be very frustrating for the child
C. Permissive
1. Level of control and warmth – low control and high warmth
2. Description
a. Parents allow much freedom and have few or no restraints on their children
b. Children receive unconditional love from their parents
c. There is communication from children to parents but parents provide little guidance for children
d. Children are more likely to inform their parents of their plans rather than ask permission to do something
e. Permissive parents don’t show it when they are feeling upset or annoyed by their children – they tend to suppress their feelings
f. Permissive parents are so intent on showing their children unconditional love that they fail to provide other important parental functions. They are especially poor at setting limits on behaviors.
D. Indifferent (or sometimes called neglectful)
1. Level of control and warmth – low control and low warmth
2. Description
a. Parents focus on stress in their own lives; have no energy left for their children
b. Parents do not display affection (or have no affection) for their children
c. Parents set no limits for their children
III. Usual outcomes of different parenting styles
A. Authoritative
Buri, Louiselle, Misukanis, & Mueller, (1988); Dornbusch, Ritter, Leiderman, Roberts, & Fraleigh, (1987); Amato & Fowler (2002); Aunola, Stattin, & Nurmi, (2000); Goodnow, (1997); Hill, (1987); Lamborn, Dornbusch, & Steinberg, (1996).
1. These children tend to be the best adjusted overall.
2. They are self-reliant
3. They are self-controlled
4. They are socially competent.
5. These children have higher self-esteem
6. They have better school performance
B. Authoritarian
Baumrind (1975, 1989); Silk, et al (2003)
1. These children tend to be withdrawn
2. They are often fearful
3. They are more dependent – cannot make decisions for themselves as adults
4. They are moody
5. They are not assertive
6. They are often irritable
7. As teenagers (especially boys) they may overact to restrictive, punishing homes in which they were raised and are more likely to become rebellious and aggressive.
C. Permissive
Baumrind (1989); Aunola, et al (2000); Barber & Olsen, (1997)
1. These children tend to be self-indulgent
2. They are more likely to be impulsive
3. They are often socially inadequate
4. They are often rebellious and aggressive like those children raised in authoritarian households
5. Some children who have been raised in permissive households may also tend to be active, outgoing, and creative.
D. Indifferent
Maccoby & Martin (1983)
1. These children have the worst outcome.
2. These children often demonstrate destructive impulses
3. These children often display delinquent behaviors
IV. Parenting styles differ widely across cultures and family variations also differ.
Darling & Steinberg (1993). For example, Chinese parents are often authoritarian and highly controlling but their parenting style often yields high academic achievement (Chao, 1994). The above information is the result of broad research and reflect norms (what the usual result is). There are always anecdotal stories of how children turned out well-adjusted from neglectful parents or parents who appear to be authoritative but whose children are poorly adjusted.
References
Amato, P.R., & Fowler, F. (2002). Parenting practices, child adjustment, and family diversity. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 64, 703-716.
Aunola, K., Slattin, H., & Burmi, J.E., (2000). Parenting styles and adolescents’ achievement strategies. Journal of Adolescence, 23, 205-222.
Barber, B.K., & Olsen, J.A. (1997). Socialization in context: Connection, regulation, and autonomy in the family, school, and neighborhood, and with peers. Journal of Adolescent Research, 12, 287-315.
Baumrind, D. (1975). Early socialization and the discipline controversy. Morristown, NJ: General Learning Press.
Baumrind, D. (1978). A dialectical materialist’s perspective on knowing social reality. In W. Damon (Ed.). New Directions for Child Development, 2, 61-82. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
Baumrind, D. (1980). New directions in socialization research. American Psychologist, 35, 639-650.
Baumrind, D. (1989). Rearing competent children. In W. Damon (Ed.), Child development today and tomorrow (pp. 349-378)). San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
Baumrind, D. (1991). The influence of parenting style on adolescent competence and substance use. Journal of Early Adolescence, 11, 56-95.
Buri, J.R., Louiselle, P.A., Misukanis, T.M., & Mueller, R.A. (1988). Effects of parental authoritarianism and authoritativeness on self-esteem. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 14, 271-282.
Chao, R.K. (1994). Beyond parental control and authoritarian parenting style: Understanding Chinese parenting through the cultural notion of training. Child Development, 65(4), 1111-1119.
Darling, N., & Steinberg, L. (1993). Parenting style as context: An integrative model. Psychological Bulletin, 113, 487-496.
Dornbusch, S.M., Ritter, P.L., Leiderman, P.H., Roberts, D.F., & Fraleigh, M.J. (1987). The relation of parenting style to adolescent school performance. Child Development, 58(5), 1244-1257.
Goodnow, J.J. (1992). Parental belief systems: the psychological consequences for children. Hillsdale, NJ: Erlbaum.
Hill, J.P. (1987). Research on adolescents and their families past and present. In C.E. Irwin, Jr. (Ed.), New Directions for Child Development, 37, 13-32. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
Holden, G.W., & Miller, P.C. (1999). Enduring and different: A meta-analysis of the similarity in parents’ child rearing. Psychological Bulletin, 125, 223-254.
Kilgore, K., Snyder, J. & Lentz, C. (2000). The contribution of parental discipline, parental monitoring, and school risk to early-onset conduct problems in African American boys and girls. Developmental Psychology, 36, 835-845.
Lamborn, S.D., Dornbusch, S.M., & Steinberg, L. (1996). Ethnicity and community context as moderators of the relations between family decision making and adolescent adjustment. Child Development, 67, 283-301.
Maccoby, E.E., & Marin, J.A. (1983). Socialization in the context of the family: Parent-child interaction. In P.H. Mussen (Ed.), Handbook of child psychology: Vol. 4. Socialization, personality, and social development (pp. 1-102). New York: Wiley.
Pettit, G.S., Bates, J.E., & Dodge, K.A. (1997). Supportive parenting, ecological context, and children’s adjustment: A seven-year longitudinal study. Child Development, 68, 908-923.
Silk, J.S., Morris, A.S., Kanaya, T., & Steinberg, L.D. (2003). Psycholgocial control and autonomy granting: Opposite ends of a continuum or distinct constructs? Journal of Research on Adolescence, 13, 113-128.
Zhou, Q., Eisenberg, N., Losoya, S.H., Fabes, R.A., Reiser, M., Guthrie, I.K., Murphy, B.C., Cumberland, A.J., & Shepard, S.A. (2002). The relations of parental warmth and positive expressiveness to children’s empathy-related responding and social functioning: A longitudinal study., Child Development 73, 893-915.
